Cup Competition...

Let's be honest, we all want to win and the lure of a trophy on the sideboard at our maturing years is even more enticing as we hope to banish the memory at receiving the Most Improved Player Award as a 12 year old (because you came 2nd in both the Players' Player and Manager's Player of the Year... but it is fine, I am over it... honestly... I mean it was one 1 point I lost out by... to the higher profile attackers in the team... playing out of position at Left Back... scored 4 goals... picked for the League Rep & County Team... never missed a minute... just drop the subject, I wish I hadn't said anything).

So we've yet to get to the 'business end' of the season, but silverware is already dominating thoughts. With the strength of "Kicking" Ongar this season, even our improved performances mean that we are unlikely to win every single game AND see our challengers drop the necessary points to see a Lazarus-like league triumph.

Today we travelled to E17 for a Quarter Final vs Old Parmiterians but most of the changing room chatter was about the post-match presentation of WotW. What started out as a figure of fun has now morphed into a magnificent manifestation of team spirit.

It may not be as big as the prize for Indy 500 (5ft 4), as old as the America's Cup (1851), or as expensive as the FIFA World Cup ($20m), but not one of them can boast a living plant, luminous lettering or a dancing flower. The trophy has taken on a life of its own and now players are cowering from and clamouring for it in equal measure... knowing that they will have to transport it home and then obliged to further adorn it for the next recipient.

Back to the game and the Gaffer was delayed by domestic issues and dodgy traffic... meaning a rushed teamtalk and a minimal warm up occurred. 2 debutantes took the field with the ginger wizard Paul Evitt in midfield and Rod Hull's younger brother Martin in goal. Martin saw some action in the 1st minute by performing a juggling act that is now known as "Doing an Aidie" so with 89 minutes left on the clock, we had it all to do to claw back the deficit and get a winner.

Splinters levelled things up shortly afterwards, before DD saw stars in both penalty boxes by fluffing a 1-on-1 with the opposition keeper and then slipping to let OP's regain their advantage. It was a real Joan Rivers affair... full of nip and tuck, whilst not being particularly pretty. Splinters succumbed to his rolled ankle (if only they were as thick and strong as Dom's?!) with Dave East replacing him. A restrained bollocking was delivered by the Gaffer, with the introduction of Bumble and change in formation paying immediate dividends when Dean's younger but equally as short brother popped up with an equaliser. Dom grabbed his 2nd of the game and a delightful chip by Big Lucy gave an air of respectability to the scoreline. Further chances were fluffed and a 3rd change in formation soaked up the pressure like a pair of Tena Pants (Heavy Flow) until the Gaffer introduced himself to make it 4-3, before quickly subbing himself and his dodgy knee . The final whistle went and the 45s march on to further unchartered territory that Sir Francis Drake would have been proud of... and another step closer to a cup to keep WotW company in the trophy cabinet.

Line Up

Martin (GK) DD Woodsy James Bumble Babs Ev Tel Spencer

Dom (2) Lucy (1) Splinters (1)

Dave East Little Gary

Crocks

The Gaffer